Honesty - a virtue?
Am in the wondering-aloud (albeit to the pc screen and the walls) mode...
Is honesty a virtue - that everyone holds dear? desires? avoids? falls short of?
Someone close to me always laments about being picked on for being too honest to me!?
Yeah, the outcome of being honest to yourself or others = good? bad? Maybe that's why there's something called a white lie?...or maybe that's why some people choose to be in a state of nonchalance or even oblivion, refusing to let others' hurls of so-called honesty get to them?
I still don't know if it had been a good move to be honest to a friend -recently-about how i felt. It was a genuine no-malice-intended sharing about the friend. Nothing judgemental or personal or confrontational. Merely sharing.Maybe to me, it was part of ventilation and opening up, but to the friend, it was an unwelcome sharing / gentle reminder or reproach he/she didn't want to hear? I really don't know. What i do know is, ties are now somehow strained without any quarrels or dramatic arguments or exchanges.
It's strange how things can be so irreversible. You know how you had tried so hard to keep a secret and finally blurt it out unwittingly, feel that "oops!" and that's it = no way to turn back the clock at all. Or you had rehearsed umpteen times in your mind how you wanted to tell someone something, then a wrong choice of word or tone not intended - thanks to the lacklustre wiring between one's brain and mouth in that split second - and that's it = irreversible and then you feel that tinge of regret. On the other hand, restraining from being honest may also lead to all the "what-ifs".
Oh man, should i be honest or not? Yeah, tell me about being honest in a win-win manner = tactful and diplomatic, and in contrast = blunt and lacking thoughtful planning of one's words or indecisive and too hesitant when it's neither!??Either way it's still gonna rain regrets all over - over yourself or the others.
Now, have i answered my own questions? Yes or No i would say. Am i being honest then?
posted by speechie @ 7:22 PM
1 Comments:
To be honest is a choice virtue that one makes... it's the right thing to do. When we are honest with someone, it's because we care & we love. We are concerned for the growth of that person... hence we are honest to share when he/she is "off track", with the "risk" that the person will not like it.
Sure, we might be wondering how that person might react..I think it's hard to know what he/she will react. But if we withheld what we wanna say, will it benefit that person?
I am encouraged that you chose to be honest with your friend. Perhaps, at this point in time, yr friend might not like it, but in time to come yr friend will understand your concern, care and love.
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